The Wearable Life Coaching Eyeglasses

These are the eyeglasses with a built-in life coach that guides, mentors, and—if need be—provokes one to pursue better routes to attaining a happier state of being. Only available from Hammacher Schlemmer, the glasses have a built-in video camera, microphone, and speakers that connect via an integrated satellite nanophone built into the frames to a coach selected to suit your personal growth goals. A coach can see and hear what a client's day looks and sounds like. For those looking for lasting romantic relationships, a coach can observe the wearer's dating behaviors, providing rapid response in the form of remote temple shocks when one gravitates to the two-timer in the corner or sprays of calming lavender from the nosepiece before approaching “Mrs. Right”. A daily activity regimen imprinted digitally on the interior of the left eyepiece provides guidance for exercise as well as healthy eating. Sensors built into the temples detect heartrate, allowing a coach to offer encouragement such as “20 burpees are easy!” or brutal honesty such as “put down the donut, lardy!” The video camera allows a coach to provide time management reminders when one drifts off task and optional responses for hastily considered email responses or errant "Reply All" keyboard flubs. Red, Blue, or Black frames.